This is the time of year that I always think of my Memere. She passed away unexpectedly 11 years ago, three days after Christmas. Seems unreal, could it really be 11 years? I still miss her, I always will. She was my "Friday Memere". Memere always arrived on Friday afternoons with a box of Devil Dogs or Hostess chocolate covered donuts. After kisses and hugs, goodies were devoured. I think it never ceased to amaze her at how quickly six kids could polish off a box of Devil Dogs in under 5 minutes. Memere always smelled so wonderful; Estee' Lauder perfume and Canadian pink mints. It's amazing how the sense of smell can evoke such strong memories. I have a little winter white purse that belonged to my Memere. It was one of a few items I took after her death. After bringing it home I opened it up and suddenly I could smell my Memere. At first it was unsettling, the pain was too raw then. As I looked into the purse I discovered a perfectly folded embroidered hanky, a coat pin and inside a zippered compartment, a little gold metal case that holds my Memere's favorite perfume. I have since used that purse for special occasions, but Memere's things are still in there. And now when the purse is opened, smelling her perfume brings me comfort. Oh my Memere....
As much as I loved my Memere (and she loved me) there is guilt. There is that wish that I spent more time with her, that I tried harder when she attempted to show me how to crochet. I still can't crochet. I wish I had asked for her fudge recipe, she made it every Christmas, it was delicious. Everyone believes they have tomorrow to make things right, to get that fudge recipe, to say I love you....
But tomorrow is never promised. That wish for just one more day with my Memere inspired a poem/song I wrote one Christmas for my Mom, her daughter. **The poem "I Wish" is below**
9 comments:
Such a moving entry. I live with the thought that you always say "I love you" to everyone you love when you part...because you never know.
I think this is the loveliest entry in rememberance to a loved one that I've read yet! Very touching Michelle, she would be proud of you.
My daughter is very sensitive to sensory memories as I call them, she remembers things by smells. Your memory of your Memere makes me smile, because it's the same way my daughter associates things with my grandmother. She even told me that when Grammie passes away she wants her pillow because it smells like her Grammie. So, we understand about the smell thing. Beautiful memories, thanks for sharing!
Lisa
Your memere, my granddad. It's hard, isn't it?
Love,
bridgett
sooo sweet. waht a great entry. I miss my grandmother too. always will. now on to read your poem...
Oh, Songbird.. I'm sorry for your loss. I don't mean to be discriminatory, but *some* people should never have to die. It sounds selfish and cruel, but I look around the world and see so many hateful, spiteful, cruel and disgusting creatures. And they're living. And our grandmothers - dear, sweet, loving, beautiful creatures - are dead. It's not fair.
Your Memere would not want you to feel guilty. Cherish instead the memories you had with her. They were precious to her as well. My love
Tomorrow is never promised....good reminder...good entry....
Tina
Beautiful poem. I can relate to everything you wrote, and you wrote it SO well. I miss both of my g'mother's so much this time of year. I'm sure your mom will treasure this song, forever. Love, Mia
What a loving entry in memory of your Memere. I hope her lingering scent is now a source of comfort instead of sorrow for you.
Yes, we don't always have the luxury of tomorrow. I used to be one of those people too shy to say those 3 little words all the time, but not anymore. It seems to be a blessing not just to hear them but also to be able to utter them. Thanks for the reminder.
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