The above pic is a self-portrait taken on our honeymoon, April 15th, 2002
**Links are in blue
For the past week, my journal has been featured over at AOL People Connection: Local Community. Thank-you AOL, it's still there today, but not sure how much longer it will remain. After the paragraph description of my journal entry, there is a question. "Where did you meet the love of your life?" ...I've decided to put that answer in my journal.
First a bit of history from my past: I married for the first time when I was barely 22 yrs old. We dated for 2 years and I truly thought I would live happily ever after Once Upon A Time . That fairytale was not to be, however, because my ex turned out to be an extremely controlling and abusive man. I never saw that side of him until after we married. If he could not control me with his words, he would strike out physically. The first time he hit me was within the first two months of our marriage. Talk about the honeymoon being over.... Because I do not like to even think about that time of my life, it's still too painful, I will make a long story short. After one last assault on April 29, 1998, and after almost 15 years of marriage, I filed for divorce. I have never regretted that decision, my only regret is I didn't find the courage to do it sooner. My divorce was final January 9th, 1999.
Shortly after my divorce a few single girls from work and I went to check out some local single dances. I knew immediately that scene was not for me, but I went with the girls three more times. I admit, it was fun dressing up and going out with them, and more importantly, I realized that I was still desireable. After many years of being called fat & ugly, one tends to believe it's true.
One day at work (April 1999) the girls and I began talking about internet dating. On a whim I decided to place a personal ad on AOL Digital City. In my ad I stated that I was not looking for a serious relationship, just someone to have fun with during the summer. Within a week I received 74 replies! I would bring the replies and pictures into work, and the girls and I gave many of them nicknames. Mike was dubbed "motorcycle man". Mike was also the last person to reply before I removed my ad. After weeding thru the masses, I decided that 5 of the guys were worth meeting. I've heard about dating nightmares from the internet, but I consider myself one of the lucky ones. Three out of the five guys I met were truly nice people. Two were definitely players.
What attracted me to Mike initially in our conversations online was his sense of fun. He had gone sky diving twice, he scuba dived, he rode a motorcycle. He was someone I could have fun with. After a week we decided to meet at a race track. In walked this big handsome guy carrying one single yellow rose. We had a great time and felt an immediate connection. A connection that terrified me. That fear of commitment almost broke us up in the first year. I felt our relationship was too good, I waited for the other foot to drop. It never did and our love flourished. On June 14th, 2000 Mike proposed to me at our favorite cabin by a stream in the mountains.
Fast forward to present: We got married on April 14th, 2002. Two years and two babies later, we are still going strong. Our love continues to grow and change. Children tend to do that to a relationship, lol. I know that I have found the man I will grow old with. And to think I found him by placing a personal ad on a whim.
Fairy tales do sometimes come true....
:::Riding off into the sunset on his motorcycle:::
16 comments:
It's amazing, I've heard from so many friends that they met their loves on the Internet. I can think of at least 6 of my journaling friends who did that. I'd love to meet someone, but I just have this terrible fear -- fear that she will think I'm hideous, fat and ugly; fear that she's just someone who will love 'em and leave 'em; fear that she won't like my family... I'm just a chicken. But some people LIKE chicken breasts and chicken thighs, right?? LOL!
Entries like this keep me smiling all day. Thanks- and God bless you. Hugs, love & prayers. *Barb*
Oh Michelle...how I feel for you. My first marriage was like that ..took me 18 years to smarten up. But my father was also abusive to my mother and me so my self esteem was already on the down side when we met. Then I met the love of my life Lee. We had 30 wonderful years. But he passed away in 2001. I put my hat in the Cupid Junction ring and also found 5 guys I thot were worth investigating further. I still consider one of them a very good email friend. But then there is STeven. He is my current beau. I don't know where this is going if anywhere(we've been dating for 10 months). And I'm not sure I want anything to change..but time will tell. I am so happy for you. My Lee looked a little like your hubby. Made me smile... ~Barbara
Pretty wild how you can meet the right one!!
I love your story...and what a wonderful memory you have of him proposing to you by your favorite cabin by a stream...I can just picture it!
awwww. so wonderful. :)
my sister just went through a divorce, and she just told me she placed an ad online just like you did. She has gotten some replies and one of them someone she has talked to on the phone with a couple of times. It's nice to hear your story and think, maybe there are nice guys that answer those ads! lol, I always think guys are players, until I get to know them. Isn't that awful... :P
Great story, Michelle. :)
Awww.. what a great story, Michelle. Part of me can't believe you ever went through an abusive relationship because you seem so strong - but I guess you got that way through experience, huh? I'm so happy for you that you found a GOOD man, someone you could make a life with, have your beautiful babies with - someone who would love you the way you deserve to be loved. And let's face it.. he's pretty darn hunky to boot! :P
And congrats on your feature!! You rock, sistah! :D
He reminds me of my brother! You are a handsome couple and I am so happy for you! Thank God for journals! Hugs, Robyn
This was such a great story. I always wondered why you had children so late. But now I understand better. And, I am so glad you were able to break free of your first husband and found a truly wonderful man in the process. :-) ---Robbie
What a beautiful, and touching, and motivating story....
As a lover of being in love, and a believer in true love, I like nothing better than to hear stories of love. And yours was a great one. Love, marriage, children...you're very lucky, and thanks for sharing. :)
http://journals.aol.com/danielled1/Everybodyknows/
Danielle
Loved your stories. I can truly identify. I have raised four children as a single parent and there never seems to be enough time. Your kids are adorable. Thanks for sharing. I'm still looking for the man that I will grow old with. Silly isn't it. But that's what I want. Someone to hold hands with when I'm in my golden years. lol Glad you found yours........ Janet
hi again..sounds familar.(sp) In 1995, at 45, I divorced my first wife of 22 years and left the country bound for GUAM. I am a Medically Retired Air Force man with SPACE-AVAILABLE benefits who, IF i had time can travel the world over...FOR FREE!
I returned..(spent 3 days on Guam..SWELTERING HEAT/HUMIDITY, No birds on the island at all because of the tree snakes!!) to Kansas. I moved into a duplex to be close to my two children..now 26 and 28..In Sept of 95, I met Anne in a chat room, instant connection, and instant long distance phone bills. She in MinneSNOWta and me in Kansas (sorry dorothy, now gone from there). By Christmas of that same year, yes 3 months later, we knew we were in love. On March 1st of '96, I along with my daughter (then 20) and her fiance packed everything I owned and off I began on my trek North. Arrived in Minnesota...having only spoken on the phone, exchanged pictures, gifts, etc. We were married Christmas eve of that year (96) at my parents home in Oklahoma. Returned to Minnesota made our home with her 4 year old daughter. Spent 6 years there and had to return to my home state of Ok. due to dad's illness (passed away Feb 22, 2002). BUT, before moving back, during that six years, together we made Noah (now 6) and Nick (now 4)...Court(now 12 going on 18)..We live happily in Oklahoma. Im a stay at home dad..Court starts 7th grade in Aug. Noah goes into 1st, and Nick, PreK. There will be a large sigh of relief on Aug. 16 when they all enter their buildings. Noah and Nick in the same elem. school, Court in Middle school. I will take a nap. You see, I am now 54, anne is now 36. I graduated from High School on the island of Taiwan in '68 and she was born in '67. A true AOL ( in fact we sign each note, card, reminder AOL=always our love) love story that turned out great. Enjoyed your web site/journal and will watch it closely. Email if you wish. steve.
Hello Michele,
I to am with my soulmate and childhood sweetheart after like you getting married @ 21 to my 1st hubby who was abusive to me as well. Had a son who is 23 now and is th other love of my life. Unfortunatley I was unable to concieve due to endometirosis with my second husband. We were 32 when we found each other again and tried for 2 years to get pregnant but i had to have a Hysterctomy @ 34 so that ended that. I am very happy to be with my Bob though, he is and always will be my heart since we were 11 years old playing "spin the bottle" and the 1st time he kised me I was hooked for life. To bad I married my 1st husband and got distracted. I am on the right track now! Count your blessings in having those prescious babies as hard as it is right now~
michelle,
loved your stories. i am also a mom of three, a 19 year old, 3 year old and 2 year old. i do not know many other moms in similar circumstances as all my siblings (2),and inlaws (5) are childless so far and i am the youngest at 37 years old. it was great to hear the stories of your wonderful childern, i could not believe how similar our stories are. i will be printing off a copy of your journals to show my sister and mom who think my kids should be doing this or not be doing that are the same as others their age and thank you very much for such a honest portrayal of life w/ a teen and 2 toddlers. sounds like a the title to a sitcom doesnt it!!!
I read this rather hurriedly, very good and informative. I sent to my daughter who has three children. She has a 15 year old son and a 5 year old daughter and a two year old son. In reading your journal I did not see anything about your son. Did I miss it. I know my daughter will enjoy this as her hair is prematurely gray and she has just had it colored professionally. It is two shades of red and one of blonde. She is really dark brown but so much gray she hates it. Now she is tryinig to decide how much red and how much blonde. She is 35. Her first marriage was at 19 and son born just before she turned twenty. He was an alcholic and very abusive to her. They were married 5 years and when he became abusive to her son she moved in with me for 6 months the got an apt. and met her husband Tim. They hare working hard to make ends meet. Enough for now. Maybe she will write to you. My husband and I adopted her when she was three months old. He died very suddenly when she was three years old. Will close for now. Proud of you that you took time to do your website. Love, Joni :) :)
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